so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize