Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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