My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
