VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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