Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
