Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Randomize
