1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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