May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Randomize
