i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
