planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
