I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Randomize
