Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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