You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
