wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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