You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize