hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
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