Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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