we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
we're so committed to being not committed
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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