Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
