Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Randomize
