Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
