spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Did I show you my penis last night?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
