TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize
