is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
