I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
