I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize
