Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
