i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
He better not be in your backpack
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Randomize