You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
