That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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