I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize