we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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