I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I'm bleeding and have questions
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
