your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I can tuck mytits in my pants
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
