That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Randomize