Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Randomize
