WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
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