Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I can't put those talents on a resume
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Randomize
