Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
