so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
