Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I think my nap took me to another dimension
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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