whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
