like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
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