I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
After last night, I could never be a politician.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
