When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
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