Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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