totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
