Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Randomize
