Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
