I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
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