dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
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